Remember those passed crazes in the 80’s? Things like reebok pumps and cabbage patch kids? Boomboxes and the “rad” ideas of the future? Well in 2015 one of those fantasies was copied/infringed into a popularized meta reality, and it couldn’t have disappointed us more. After a full thirty minutes of rolling around your kitchen floor –yes it rolls instead of any form of hovering– you get the opportunity of a select few to blow a hole in the side of your wall. That’s right this rushed –and stolen might I add– product has been created without any limiter system for the battery causing fires and damage to the owner’s home.
I was able to get the rare opportunity to test one of these decommissioned and recalled monstrosities quite recently. As rode it down the street to a nearby coffee shop I was met with perplexed stares and a strict warning from a pair of police officers. Who let me know that operating these machines on public walk ways and our streets is actually illegal, if not meeting certain parameters and can cost you $250 when cited. I was lucky with the warning. The only way I could have made the situation any more cringy would be if I spun two fidget spinners as I rolled by on my non-hovering explosive death device.
To be fair I’m sure the product could have been great, it’s patent was copied and stolen from a man named Shane Chen, who despite what some might think, didn’t receive a penny for his creation. Which had been stolen and cheaply reproduced by the thousands in china. If it had been more popular originally and sold by the actual creator at the very least it would be safer for the public. Or at least maybe the knock offs could have been more original and advertised hover boards as devices used to improve balance, how to survive a hostile bomb situation, or god forbid, even as a handle-less segway? Unfortunately, they weren’t advertised or copied with any major difference from the original. The ones we got were a mistake, killing their short lived fad almost as quickly as the Galaxy S6 edge.